Sharon Wu | The Poly Post

Like My Mom Said, ‘Cheating Doesn’t Get You Anywhere’

By Matisse Sanchez, Nov. 1, 2022

I have become so immune to celebrity news, seeing everyone cheating such as Adam Levine, Ned Fulmer and Alex O’Connor has left me asking myself, “OK, what celebrity has not cheated?”

Fulmer, a member of the Try Guys who the world had perceived as the “Wife Guy” cheated, and he had unfortunately broken the trust of their small team and went behind their backs to indulge in a romance with his employee, Alexandra Herring, an associate producer.

Cheating has ruined and devastated people throughout the years. Cheating has now been less and less accepted by any gender.

It was not until recently that I rediscovered my love for watching the Try Guys on Buzzfeed and later as they branched out to their own brand on YouTube. The group consisted of Keith Habersberger, Ned Fulmer, Eugene Lee Yang and Zach Kornfeld and was known to be one of the most unproblematic groups on the internet and had never been known to cause any drama or be in the middle of any.

Seeing Habersberger on the screen eating his way through the menu, and Yang ranking different chips from best to worst because “I’m wrong and he’s right” was one of my favorite pastimes during my teens, which happened to be the title his series.

The disappointment that Fulmer brought onto his colleagues was something I did not expect because it seemed to me that they were the last group that could have a scandal like this.

Growing up, my mom has always said to do the right things. She said, “No hagas cosas malas, que parezcan buenas,” which translates to “don’t do bad things that appear to be right.” The world, future generations and workspaces would be better off if they followed this advice.

Sharon Wu | The Poly Post

Seeing my parents remain faithful throughout my 22 years, cheating has never been a problem in my family. I have seen them both grow out of their own insecurities and work out what would later turn out to benefit them for future fights. Seeing them flourish has helped them through adversity and pulled them through 23 years of marriage.

What I saw with my parents all those years was the willingness to never give up on each other, no matter how challenging life might have gotten. Even if life was hard, unfaithfulness was never in the picture, and putting their daughters first was something they did and will continue to do.

Cheating has never been a thought in my mind when it comes to family. Thankfully, from both sides of my family, I have seen the security in both partners and have learned to look at that and apply it to my own relationships.

Growing up and watching some of my family’s favorite telenovelas such as “Teresa,” the main protagonist finds herself cheating through various relationships to get herself a better life.

Rewatching the show earlier this summer, I gained a new meaning on the outlook Teresa had throughout the show. Although her life might have had low points and the man that she married was the love of her life, cheating was never an excuse for her to gain the social standings she had desired since her earlier youth.

Seeing Teresa would encourage me to never have a relationship of that sort but helped me understand that even through the hardships she might have had, there was no excuse to cheat on your partner.

When the world was exposed to Fulmer’s cheating scandal, I immediately asked myself, why did it seem so right to him but have such a negative consequence on the ones he loved the most? Why would he make it seem like he was doing a good thing by hiding it behind lies?

The abuse of power that bosses have over employees exploits the power that they have in the workplace and may be why it is so easy for situations like these to happen so frequently.

The world has always taken sides. Fulmer chose his, and the rest of the fans took theirs. The “Wife Guy” of the group had found himself in the middle of a scandal and in a devastating place with his best friends and employees.

Cheating in this situation highlighted the wrong that anyone can have in a workplace or any other environment. The selfish acts by someone can ruin marriages and relationships and can teach others that situations like these are OK when someone in a higher position says it is okay.

Normalizing cheating in the world has brought a lot of pain and suffering to people and has brought disappointment and shame on families and loved ones. Just like fans with O’Connor and the Try Guys with Fulmer, trust is not easily regainned and anyone in a position of power will find it difficult to be looked at in a responsible and credible way.

I realize now even the most memorable groups are not safe from scandals such as the one Fulmer was in. Their tight knit workspace branded themselves as friends and family, but even they became the talk of power imbalances and workspace exploitation.

Thankfully, the Try Guys have chosen to continue their journey without their fourth member, but regardless of outcomes and mending, it will always leave negative impacts and a bitter taste in one’s mouth.

Feature image by Sharon Wu

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