That’s what she said

By Tobias Jahn

TOBIASJAHN

When dating, prepare for some waiting

Once upon a time, in a land not far from here, the most
beautiful woman in the world was dating the most patient guy in
existence.

Let’s call them Anna-Lena and Marc. They weren’t the cutest
couple, and nobody ever thought they would be together.

They had nothing in common: She was the beauty and he was the
beast.

However, Marc was the only guy to last a whole week with
Anna-Lena.

I can only guess poor Marc would have to wait on Anna-Lena hand
and foot, but the biggest issue here and in real life is time.
Women are always making us wait.

Let’s face it, this relationship wouldn’t last a minute in the
real world.

Guys, how many times have you had to wait on a girl?

Let’s say you are supposed to go out on a date. She says be
there at some time, and be there right on the dot.

So a guy will clean up, get ready and make it to the girl’s
house right on time.

Guess who isn’t ready yet.

Yup. There she is, rollers in her hair and making you wait on
the couch while she asks you what looks good and what doesn’t. She
is late again!

Look, we like a girl that is dressed nice, but don’t spend all
night trying to look good.

We want to go out and have fun, not argue which dress makes your
butt look good.

If a relationship’s strength was based on time management, women
would be to blame for every break up. But a good guy can put up
with a woman’s inability to keep to a schedule.

Men are strong and willing to put up with the challenges that
women introduce in our life.

If we dumped every girl that forced us to wait on them, human
existence would dwindle into a world void of reproduction.

What are we supposed to do? Life isn’t even on our side on this
one. Women live longer than men.

Girls, just because you have more time to spend on earth, don’t
waste ours.

In our made up fairy tale, Marc was a patient one, and his
relationship grew on, happily ever after.

In real life, a guy is forced to grow old and deal with a
women’s constant wasting of time.

SARAHELKEAIKATI

Always late but worth the wait

Once upon a time, women took longer to get ready than men.

Then, guys took a glimpse into the world of grooming and the
tables instantly turned.

I could spend time going into detail as to why girls take so
long to get ready but just by looking around, I know that guys
clearly have a solid understanding.

With the metrosexual bug spreading rapidly, men have crossed
over to the world of primping, plucking, shaving and other various
habits previously associated with women and their lateness.

Finally, something we have in common.

Once culturally taboo, cleaning and shaping eyebrows, shaving
below the neckline and even make up, is now considered OK for males
as much as they always have been for females.

So now, he won’t be complaining about how long it takes his
girlfriend to get ready.

He’ll be right beside her studiously perfecting the arch in his
eyebrows.

Men can even be spotted in nail salons soaking their hands and
feet in paraffin wax as manicure veterans try their best not to
stare.

For the guys who have chosen to stick with the
throw-on-a-shirt-and-go method, be patient with the women in your
lives.

While you might save some minutes by blindly picking a shirt and
starting your day, we would much rather take our time.

Clothing trends come and go but being fashionably late is always
in style.

Time is the least of our worries when piecing together the
perfect outfit is the task at hand.

As far as we’re concerned, the biological clock is the only
situation where time is of any importance.

Otherwise, the world can wait, and so can he.

Cut us some slack.

It takes time and effort to fool a man into thinking we look
like this every waking moment.

So you can either quit complaining and appreciate the measures
we take to look good or do the Ryan Seacrest and join us over here
on the pretty side — just stay away from our stilettos.

Reach Sarah Elkeaikati at: opinions@thepolypost.com

That

Paul Rosales/Poly Post

That’s what she said

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